Approach anxiety is a completely natural process that occurs in the body and is credited to our flight or fight response.
Women feel this same anxiety however its triggered differently as it is to men. Women will feel it when they get nervous around men they secretly like, also when they’re flirting with married or men that are not single (they feel they’re doing something they shouldn’t be).
Do you feel these symptoms before you’re about to approach or even just thinking approach an attractive woman?
-Lost for words
-Defensive body language i.e. crossing our arms
-Self-defeating excuses e.g. she’s probably got a boyfriend, she looks angry, she’s going to shoot me down.
These are just some of many symptoms we feel when it times to approach…
No matter if you’ve been doing this for 5 years or 5 days you will FEEL some form of approach anxiety, some guys are good at masking it, others are not, and also some have been de-sensitized to approaching that much (like me) and literally don’t think about it.
This is a good way to to get over this anxiety. Stop thinking.
Your mind is your worst enemy so waste it. Your mind (especially the male mind) is very logical and females respond to the emotional.
So if you’re intelligent then this could be a downside to having brains as I find that a lot of intelligent men who take my workshops in Australia don’t do well with the ladies as they think too much than necessary.
Women go out to have fun and not to be stimulated intellectually. So there shouldn’t be that much thinking happening in the first place. Makes sense yes?
If you’re thinking logically then you’re literally shooting yourself in the foot, as you should be responding in real time on an emotional response level.
There are several exercises you can do to prevent approach anxiety from affecting you…
1. The $100 game; Give your friend a hundred dollars in 5 $20 bills and ask him to hold onto it for you. Every time you do an approach you receive $20 back. You will realize that NOT approaching a woman is NOT worth $20 and will make it easier. This will ensure you do 5 approaches at least to get your money back.
2. The 3-second rule. Approach anxiety will affect you no matter what however this 3-second rule will drastically limit its effectiveness on you by throwing you to the lions so to speak without thinking. Whenever you see an attractive women just approach no matter what (WITHIN 3 SECONDS)
3. Convince yourself the simple truth that you’re not disarming a bomb here and you’re simply chatting to some girls. There is no consequence and no harm will come of it. Approach anxiety is essentially a high quality problem.
The major emotion stopping successful guys like you from approaching hotties is fear. Fear has a mobilizing power in affecting your anxiety when it comes time to approaching attractive women.
What are the 4 major fears stopping you?
1. Fear of rejection
2. Fear of the approach
3. Fear of verbal abuse
4. Fear of physical violence
These are the four (4) major fears fueling your approach anxiety. The only way to get over this fear is to get use to it and familiarize yourself with its toll.
You will find that this anxiety actually assist in making you more energetic and can actually HELP you. This is perhaps the best way to know your fear well and that is to accept it, embrace it and re-frame that it’ll help you become more energetic.
Girls don’t want boring guys do they?
Talk to you soon
Alex Coulson has been a core leader in the ever evolving dating industry, he holds cutting-edge dating workshops/courses every weekend around Australia and regularly holds dating seminars on attracting women internationally.
For more information and to claim access to Alex Coulson’s “5 Step System” Audio E-course for FREE (limited time only) head over to http://www.alexcoulson.com
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