How To Date Women: 3 Secrets For Reading Female Body Language


Remember.. your job is to CREATE attraction – by making her FEEL “the un-explainable” – just by being you – the signs are there sure.. – but to confirm YOUR actions – AND to reinforce how cool you already are – good luck player – see you in the game – S

Note.. Xuma is a serious PUA from back when.. – I never met him.. even in Mtl where the guys used to meet – but I heard stories & they was good – as such this gets the highest rating – not because I’ve heard it before but.. because – it’s field tested – S


If you analyze the many points of how we interact with women, you’ll see that there’s several places where guys get “stuck.” These are some of the critical decision points in dating women that men need to know how to navigate.

First of all, I want to make it clear that if you are experiencing ANY anxiety over approaching and talking to women, then you should not be thinking too much about reading female body language.


Because you’ll just wind up going further up into your head, and that is only going to make it even harder to keep yourself in-the-moment when you’re talking with women.

Reading female body language should be an “add-on” to your game, not the primary part of it.

There’s another reason for this, and it’s the whole underlying premise for what I teach men: You must be the one leading the conversation. If she feels like she’s in control and dictating how things go, she’s not going to feel as attracted to you.

And if you’re sitting back and waiting to read her body language, you are most certainly not LEADING. You’re reacting, and that is very dangerous.

So now that we’ve got that out of the way, what are some of the secrets of reading female body language that you can use to your advantage…?

Reading Female Body Language – Secret 1: What are the Deltas?

Delta is the Greek symbol used in mathematics to denote change. So if I were to ask you what the delta is if the temperature goes from 70 degrees to 80 degrees, you would say it’s a delta of 10.

Well, with reading female body language, deltas are the most important indicator.

You see, if there’s a CHANGE in any of her signals, that’s more important than any one signal that you might observe on its own.

For example, if she goes from being open and animated with her conversation one minute, and the next minute she is closed and less talkative, there’s a good chance you may have misstepped somewhere. You’ll want to figure that out. (And don’t panic, either!)

Obviously we want to work to achieve POSITIVE deltas. That’s where things that you see in reading female body language are improving rather than getting worse.

Reading Female Body Language – Secret 2: Look for the big signals…

The big signals in body language are the ones that are actually important. Unfortunately, a lot of guys have been conned into thinking that certain body language signals are more important than they actually are.

For example: Dilation of the pupils.

It has been shown that when a woman’s pupils are dilating (getting bigger) this indicates that she is getting more attracted to you.

This is true, but it’s also nearly worthless in most situations. If you’re in a dark environment – like a bar or club – her eyes have to dilate just to see where she’s going. So you might end up confusing that one.

What’s more important?

Making eye contact!

If she’s looking at you and locking eyes, and you’re making strong eye contact, this will CREATE attraction. (Remember that our primary goal with women is not to wait for attraction to happen but to create it.)

Reading Female Body Language – Secret 3: Don’t miss her friends’ signals…

If you’re out in a group situation where there are multiple women, and it’s the first time you’re talking to them, you need to watch what the OTHER women are doing as well.

A lot of guys forget about this when approaching and meeting women, and then they are caught off guard when the girlfriends were turned off or unhappy, and then they pull your target away from you. Remember that you will not be able to override the “friend factor” in these situations.

So watch for body language signs that the other women give off. If you see that they are closed off or not responsive to you, it’s your first goal to get them to open back up – or your ship is sunk.

If you remember these tips on reading female body language, you’ll be able to stay focused and aware, without being pulled out of the moment and vibe of the conversation.

– Carlos Xuma
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